Imilda and her cup of coffee

Slouching, I sat in a weary heap; a tired soul. I tried, I searched, I called to the surface any energy, any joy, anything at all. But nothing came.

Nothing. Emptiness. Vast, unyielding barren depths within me.

I wanted something. I wanted to feel anything. But yet nothing prevailed.

Was it simply exhaustion?
Was there a trace of depression?
Was there shackles of spiritual attack?
Was it simply pessimism?

Nothing. I had no answer to my questions. I had no theory. And worse, no desire to dig deeper.

So I sat. And attempted to listen. Unable to. My heart was lost in the seas of life bobbing directionless. My mind was floating through the sky weaving among the clouds with no stability.

A woman was answering the speaker's question. I couldn't tell you the question that she was answering. I couldn't tell you how she answered.

But I can tell you this, my name was spoken in that moment.
Imilda tapped me on the shoulder. She was assigned from the hotel to look after the event I was currently in charge of hosting.

Surprised I turn to her. In a few moments she put in my hands a cup of coffee, and said "I called in a favor, you need it, enjoy". And as quickly as she deposited the cup into my hands, she disappeared.

My eyes held nothing. Out of nothing arose something. Gratitude. Deep deep gratitude.

One action; worth was given life within me.

A cup of coffee. You may wonder why did this shift my world so much? You may know or you may not, but I don't like coffee. At all. Actually, I have tried hard to come to like it but have been unable to find a style that hides the bitterness of the coffee bean enough. A few days ago, Josh ordered a milkshake style coffee. I tried it and somehow ended slurping up the whole thing! He had to order himself another one :)

It's Friday afternoon. The weary girl, me, was in her last session of a huge 2-week tour she planned for Britain's number 1 sales and communication coach. Two sessions a day, 5 days, hundreds of staff, details, payments, conversations. The time had me swirling.

And Imilda saw it. She saw the nothingness within. She discovered a need I had and left it unexpressed. She chose to reach out, love and serve me. All with a cup of coffee that tasted just like the cup I slurped down a few days ago.

She listened, she observed, she acted.

After the first few sips reached the empty pit of my soul, clarity came within view. I began to think and process again. Nothing was replaced by reflection: a constant companion I'm fond of.

Do I listen? Or do I just speak? Not limited to verbal speech.... am I truly listening to the needs of those around me? Or am I just self-speaking my own needs and selfish desires contorting my world view to revolve and pay tribute to myself?

Do I observe? I love people watching. I love to observe the character among the individuals in my life. I observe my current boss; she has taught me how to maintain a level of professionalism I've not been exposed to before; how to remain calm in the face of a crazy pull-my-hair-out work day; and how achieve the impossible. But do I observe as Imilda observes? She observed to give. It sounds like I observe to take. There's a difference. The difference is painful to discover. self-centered or others focused?

Do I act? When I see opportunities to love loudly on those around me despite their beliefs or opinions, do I act? Do I think of ways to bless, yet they don't make it out past my mind? Do I hear scripture telling me how to love, and do my actions reflect THAT love? Or am I acting in line with my self-made and self-proclaimed "idea" of love?

A simple cup of coffee, with milk and ice cream.

I was encouraged recently by a dear mentor to see the world always through a spiritual lens. Coffee gave me that opportunity today. Imilda gave me the gift of witnessing the reality of it.

Nothing chased and replaced with thoughts of the gospel. I want to love Jesus. I want to love people. I need to be taught.

Thank you Imilda for lesson #1... listen, observe, act. Look to chase another's nothingness and replace it with identity, purpose, value and love.

A cup of coffee given to me unexpected made me feel a great sense of worth. As a follower of Christ, I want to be a bestower of this and not just a receiver.

"A crown of beauty instead of ashes, the oil of joy instead of mourning, a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair" (Is. 61:3)

Spirit lavish others with the Father's love through us. amen.